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Being Single Is Amazing So Spare Us Your Hopeful Love Advice

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Let me repeat that once, “Being single is amazing” and we really enjoy it, we do. However, every single person (pun intended) encounters that one relationship-obsessed friend that is hopeful about our “great love”. But, what if we don’t want it? What if we actually enjoy being single? Is it really that hard for people in relationships to understand that single women can be happy?

There are many reasons why being single is amazing.

For instance, we don’t need to tell someone everything we will be doing. Or explain why we were traveling to a specific place at a specific time. We don’t need to constantly spend our energy wondering whether or not someone truly loves us. Or you know trying to figure out if the “ex” is really just a friend. Sure, when we find guys and vibe with them many of these things happen, but it’s different.

Being single is also great because you actually do have a lot of time for yourself. I have seen couples everywhere and most of their free time is about each other. For singles, we can watch “Wild Child” for the billionth time. Or we can Netflix and chill while wearing a gorgeous lace gown and drinking wine. We can take up any new hobby that interests us without having to wonder whether or not our “partner” would enjoy the hobby as well. So yes, being single is amazing.

In a more advanced and important sense, being single also allows you to focus on your career a lot more. I am not saying that you have to choose between your career and relationship, I know women balancing both incredibly well. But being single does allow you to brainstorm at awkward hours and work whenever you wish to. It allows you to put all your heart into your work, put all your mind into thinking about the next step, you don’t have an emotional baggage so you aren’t that scared of taking risks. Here’s the thing, being single takes strength because the whole world is out to tell you how badly you need love, so you become somewhat stronger than you imagine yourself to be.

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But, in all this beauty there is always somebody that wants to pressure us into feeling lonely or bad about being single.

Some of these start with “It’s okay if you feel lonely” on days you are simply feeling a little off. Usually, you are just on your period. I actually detest the manner in which they portray it like it’s something we are ashamed of accepting. It’s not like that, we are happily single, it’s usually written on our forehead because we are so open to getting laid. So, why? Why do you Nancy, think that I am lonely?

At times, these even end up becoming those hopeful “oh don’t worry, the one for you is out there too” conversations. It’s as if people fail to understand that you are not looking, my life is not a constant ship trying to find an island. It’s as if we have to have a board that says being single is amazing for people to get it. I am here for the journey, I am cruising and I am loving it. I am not waiting for the one, and that doesn’t mean I don’t believe in love or am heartbroken. It just means that if “the one” comes along so be it, I am just not going to waste my time and actually wait for that one.

I guess the point is that being single is amazing, it’s enjoyable and overall it’s a choice we have made. It’s what makes us happy and all people should understand that. We don’t spend our precious time telling you how to live your life. We expect the same kind of respect for our singleness. If we don’t talk to you about how great being single is, please don’t try selling off the idea of being in a relationship.

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Here is the thing, relationships aren’t products to be bought off shelves, they are a connection. As single women, we connect with lots of people, some we connect eternally with and some it’s just a matter of minutes. But we don’t try selling our singleness like the next big New York Times Bestseller. So why waste your time explaining a lifestyle we don’t want to us? Maybe it’s just human nature to want a little approval.

Don’t forget to read last week’s note on singleness. Signing off with love.

XoXo Queen X.

 

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